#it's so crazy how so much has changed in the span of a month

[monstermp3]

i can't wait to get rid of all these damn stressors by the end of the week. i need to Know things!! bc i want to feel better!! anyway when all these things wrap up i'm definitely treating myself to something. a drink or a nice day out or just . something. bc i'm genuinely going through it rn and i've been sooooo strong holding it in for over a month now. and i feel like things Need to go well from now on

[shima-draws]

I've been teasing her for months!! But at long last her ref is complete 🌷

I actually DON'T have a 5 page essay on her backstory this time (like I did for Ilari LMAO) but I do have some info about her if anybody is curious!

Name: Ione

Age: 25

Hair color: Silver

Eye color: Orangish-yellow

Element: Light

Grabbing info from the few posts I've talked about her already, Ione was originally a very famous singer, pretty much an idol within the world of ATS. She'd hold huge concerts that were always sold out and people from around the world would flock to see her perform. Eventually tho all of the attention started to attract the wrong kinds of people, and sooner or later Ione was "scouted" by a very rich man who wanted her all to himself. She was manipulated and blackmailed into signing a contract with him that would essentially end her touring and make it so that she would become a private singer for him. He basically chained her with this contract and so she disappeared from the public eye.

Ione soon discovered that other people with similar talents had also been gathered and trapped by this man's contracts. Among them was a prodigy violin player who she grew very close with. The two of them struggled under the demands of this man, and eventually violin boy started to get physically abused by him 😭 Things escalated to the point where Ione decided she wanted OUT and was determined to do anything to escape. This led to a very...traumatic event that caused her to go mute by choice.

When Ione finally makes her escape, thankfully she's changed so much that people don't recognize her in public (mostly her hair! It used to be short and didn't cover one of her eyes before). Shortly after she runs into Nahu and his group, and is unceremoniously recruited to join them lol (Nahu can be VERY persuasive). Ione communicates with them through sign language, which luckily a couple of them are fluent in--Ezio and Sage to be specific. They then teach the others in the group sign language too. It takes Nahu a bit to get the hang of it bc he has like, no attention span whatsoever, but being a dragon elemental helps since his senses are super attuned all the time, so he can generally tell what Ione is feeling and what she's trying to convey when she talks to him :")

Over time Ione grows closer with them, and like everybody else is hit with the Found Family, and realizes that yeah. She'd do absolutely ANYTHING for this group of crazy weirdos. She starts to fall in love with Nahu (bc who WOULDN'T), and slowly gains the courage to use her voice again. This leads to secret meetings with Sage, who helps her relearn how to use her vocal cords.

Eventually her past catches up with her, of course, but the group all bands together to set her free from it. She has to face off against violin boy, who thought she'd abandoned him and got Messed Up Mentally as a result, so THAT'S a thing she's gotta deal with. But she's able to reach him by singing for the first time in over five years, and everyone absolutely loses their shit at how beautiful her voice is and they all cry and it’s very emotional!!

Even after regaining her voice she still prefers to stay quiet most of the time, as that is what she's comfortable with, but she's totally okay with speaking when she needs to. Also I need to mention this but bc she used to be like. An idol. Obviously her routines consisted of both song and dance so she's a pretty good dancer. Out of everyone in the group, Ione is the ONLY person Ezio will dance with (and he is a very VERY good dancer himself, but will only dance with someone who can keep up with him, which Ione can). Everyone is very jealous of this, ESPECIALLY Nahu lol bc he wants to dance with Ezio too 😂

Ione's a light elemental! I haven't given a LOT of thought into her powers yet but I do know that her singing makes her stronger and also gives her powers a boost, which in turn helps the rest of the group. She also can ride on these light waves--I will have to draw them sometime bc I can't really explain them in words, it'd be better to show them visually lol

And that's her!! My flower light mute girl <33333

[tvgals]

‘ CHILL OUT ‘

pt.3

READ PARTS 2 AND 1 BEFORE READING THIS !

— e42! miles morales x black! fem! reader

synopsis — you’ve been cheated on, you’ve been lied to, and you’ve been heartbroken but you damn well ain’t gon be wallowing in self pity forever.

“you’re not mad?” jess asks you, her face covered in surprise. “nope.” you shrug, grabbing your bag full of snacks and walking out of the store, jess trying to follow up behind you. “on god?” she inquires, biting the inside of her cheek. you kept on walking without any response. “i take that as a no. look, please don’t say anything to jaya. she really trusts me and-“ jess is cut off with you heaving a sigh. “you’ve been talking shit too, huh?” you confront jess, well..not really..it’s more of a yes or no question. “what? ahah! why would you say that?” jess chuckles nervously, twiddling her thumbs.

“i’ve known jaya since sixth grade and i been living in brooklyn since i was born. i know when people talk shit about me, i’m not an idiot. so i will ask you one more time,” you take a deep breath. “have you been talking shit?” jess sighs and stops walking, turning around and walking the other way. that was enough of an answer for you. “fuckin’..” you mumble, walking back to your dorm. everything fell apart within the span of two days. you learned your boyfriend cheated on you, your so called “friend” was talking shit about you to someone new. this was terrible. you missed miles, as much as you hate to say it. you wanted him to hold you and have him tell you he loves you and all of this never happened. you look on your key ring and see the key to miles’ dorm room. you change routes and head over to his room, hoping it’d just be him so his roommate wouldn’t have to hear the oh so awkward conversation. you walk up the stairs leading to the dorms and find yourself outside miles’,contemplating on leaving. before you could think anymore, you insert the key into the lock and walk in, the smell of miles’ cologne hitting your nose. you walk into miles’ room to see him on the bed, seeming as if he’s sleeping. you knew this was a dumb idea. you bite your lip and turn to leave.

“come back..” miles mumbles, rolling into the wall to make room for you. “miles-“ you groan. “just come here. please.” you take your shoes off and lay next to him, trying to not make bodily contact with your ex. in his bed. you and miles sit in silence for a while, listening to the bustling sound of traffic outside and the occasional laughter of children walking down the street. “miles.” you whisper, turning to face him. “yeah?” he whispers right back. “what really happened?” you ask, watching miles hands inch closer to your own.

“if i tell you this you won’t do nothing stupid, right?” miles turns to you, cocking a brow. “promise.” you tell him. miles sighs. “y’know that party i went to like a month ago?” you nod. “i was walking ‘round talkin’ to people, and yo’ lil’ friend jaya came up to me talking bout how she wanted to get put on with me — so i said no cause i already got a girl, right?” you nod along while miles talks. “then she was talking ‘bout how she was better than you this that and the third and i’m like, ‘what?’ you feel me?” you scrunch your face up. someone has to be lying. it’s either him or jaya. “wait wait,” you interrupted him. “jaya said you called her phone?” miles scrunches his face up and looks at you crazy.

“forreal? nah, she’s lying to you ma’.” miles chuckles lowly, pulling you into his side. “are you sure?” you question him, ignoring the fact he told you he did inafct cheat.

“mhm.”

you couldn’t help but think he was lying too, miles was prone to lie. like the time he said he would come home at 9 and came home at 2:30 in the morning or the time he told you he’d never lie to you, but he did, and you couldn’t help but think he’s doing it again. “you’re a liar, miles.” you whisper into his stature.

“i wouldn’t lie to you-“ “but you would. you’ve done it countless times and you expect me to fall for it again. well i won’t, miles morales,” you tell him, pushing yourself off of the bed and walking out his room. “baby, come back.” miles says sternly, getting up and following behind you. “no. you can’t force me to stay here wit’ yo lying, cheating ass. you told me you cheated,” you pointed an accusatory finger into his chest. “and you wanna sit here and sweet talk me? well it’s not gonna fucking work.” you sniff, turning around and walking out the door.

you were gonna get your revenge and fast.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

TAGLIST ; — @venusluvslove @mangolog @ohmaiscool15 @ohsanghoe @iiilovemilfs @garnetj @guapaneeseb @nekoweb @samndwich @cloudniteee @azadabts @elitesanjisimp @theyfwkayla14 @lennielane @kelesisworld @aaliyahlia-babyy @dorkmuffin27 @markleedreams @violxtbxbyy @pinkluvrr @yourrfavzxri @noraloralei @anoungsoneandonly @neteyamsmunch @1lennii @

[everythingharrypotterblog]

charmed [16]: 'cat, rat, dog, and dove' (remus lupin x reader)

a/n: WELCOME BACK TO CHARMED. WE ARE HERE. we have arrived to this moment. BUCKLE THE FUCKING FUCK UP.

brief summary: the year has culminated into this one fateful night at the shrieking shack. word count: 9k

series summary: if you're here, u know what this series is abt im not gonna waste space and recopy it here THIS CHAPTER IS ALREADY TOO LOADED.

series masterlist here

join taglist here

16.

The sun was out. Its rays peeking through the leaves of trees, their heat was much stronger in this month of spring than it was in autumn, when Y/N and Remus took their first early morning walk to escape from the Castle. It became a habit they maintained all school year, and it was so hard to believe that they had already walked their way to final examinations season. Two terms had rolled by, laying down all the tiles needed to strengthen their relationship even more.

Y/N’s arm was around Remus’ bicep. It was warm enough now for them to abandon their jackets, and they strolled through the Castle grounds in simple button-ups.

Remus peeked down at Y/N, who by reflex caught his eye. He shut an eye tightly in an exaggerated wink. Y/N smiled, resting her head against his arm for a second.

“Can’t wait for our kid to experience all that is Hogwarts.” Remus said.

Y/N’s eyebrows knit together as she beamed up at him.

“Rem…”

Their chests burned from elation as they continued in their stride.

“Thinking a bit ahead though, don’t you think, we’ve got more than 11 years before we get to that point.” Y/N chuckled.

“Oh, you’re right. Before that, it’ll be you n’ me teaching them.”

“I agree with you. Sending them to Muggle primary school seems way too risky for exposure.”

“I do worry about socialization though.”

“Hmm. Me too. We should probably get in touch with other wizard families that have children the same age as ours.”

They came to a small halt as they overlooked the train tracks.

“I can’t wait for our kid to get on the train for the first time.” Y/N sighed.

Remus patted her hand in his. “What did you feel your first time on it?”

“Terrified.” Y/N chortled. “I was anxious even as a child. You?”

“Me too. But I guess, something really deep inside me- I don’t know. I just felt like my life was going to change, I guess.”

Y/N smiled softly at the gentle man before her.

“And we have to take that train really soon again.”

“Yeah.”

“Crazy.”

They continued walking, the castle of Hogwarts standing tall against them, hovering and watching over them as it has done for so long.

+

As the year continued to draw to a close, the exam season proceeded on. Today were the Charms finals for the 3rd-years, as well as the 5th-years’ OWL’s. Even the Weasley twins had been spotted with their books open, working in a corner of the library.

Y/N downed the last of her tea, as she rifled through a pack of fresh grading sheets. She waved her wand, and yesterday’s 2nd-year evaluations floated upwards, inserted themselves neatly in a folder, and slid themselves into her briefcase.

She clapped her hands together and got up to the door, opening it to a crowd of her 3rd-years. 

“Ready?”

She let them trickle in and take their seats at the individually separated desks. Walking through the aisles, she placed an exam sheet on each one facing down.

“Alright, everyone, please get your things straight and then leave your bags up here in the front. Remember, you’re only allowed your quills for the written part.”

“You guys have one hour. Don’t forget to check both sides of the paper. Time starts… now.”

A synchronized whoosh of 30 papers being flipped over echoed across the room, followed by the etching of quills.

Y/N hated the written exams. She had nothing to do but to count the tiles in the classroom and twiddle her thumbs.

She was on her 5th recount of how many tiles spanned from one wall to another when a figure flashed in her peripheral.

Remus had passed by and judging the complete silence, assumed Y/N was sitting an exam. He waved cheerily, happy he had opted for practical examinations. Y/N rolled her eyes when she spotted him. Remus turned back around and passed the classroom door again.

“STOP.” Y/N mouth silently, gesturing to her students.

A few of them looked up and laughed, leading to a few more turning their heads.

“Enough.” Y/N shook her head, waving her wand and the door slammed shut, Remus disappearing from their sights.

“Professor Lupin’s just gloating that all his finals are over.” Y/N hushed the group. “Now get on, I’m not giving you extra time.”

She winked at the end, and the students returned to their scrolls, the atmosphere in the classroom noticeably lighter.

+

Light filled the room as Y/N clicked the lamp open. She turned to her side to find Remus wide awake as well.

“Can’t sleep?” She muttered.

“Nope.”

Y/N huffed, stacking her pillows and coming up to a seated position.

“It’s the full moon soon. How are you feeling?”

“The usual.” Remus yawned, turning on his side. He examined the grey circles under Y/N’s eyes through his wrinkle-decorated own. “I just feel a bit weird.”

“Hm.” Y/N responded. “Me too.”

“We’re probably just tired from so many back to back exams and all the grading.”

“Yeah. And my heart is kind of hurting. I just can’t really believe this year is ending. This has been the best job I’ve ever had in my whole life.”

Remus slid his hand under the covers to find hers.

“All good things must come to an end, my love.”

Y/N smiled sadly.

“What are the odds Flitwick needs another year off, eh?”

Remus chuckled.

Y/N clicked the lamp off and the two laid back in once again total darkness. Outside their window, roamed the creatures of the night. Centaurs, unicorns trudging across the Forbidden Forest, Dementors floating outside the Castle perimeter, and strolling stealthily in the Hogsmeade village; a ginger cat and its newfound friend, a big shaggy black dog.

+

Remus strolled along on his daily walk of the Castle grounds. Y/N had opted to stay in bed well into the afternoon that day, feeling more tired than usual.

He found a tree stump near Hagrid’s Hut and installed himself comfortably under it. He pulled a book from the pocket of his robes and opened it to the page he had last marked. About three quarters of an hour passed when he noticed Harry, Hermione and Ron come down and go into Hagrid’s. He returned to his book.

A small while later, he noticed more figures make their way to that direction.  One sported a bowler hat, which he recognized as the Minister of Magic Cornelius Fudge, and two wizards followed him. One of them had a shiny axe attached to his belt, which glistened when it caught the sun.

Comprehension dawned upon Remus. He had heard of Hagrid’s Hippogriff case with Malfoy and the Ministry, and Y/N had told him in passing of the Harry and his friends’ interest in the outcome.

They emerged from the hut and crossed paths with the men. Remus closed his book. Those three better not involve themselves any further with the case, he thought. He didn’t want them to be exposed to the execution.

+

"THE DARK LORD LIES ALONE AND FRIENDLESS, ABANDONED BY HIS FOLLOWERS. HIS SERVANT HAS BEEN CHAINED THESE TWELVE YEARS. TONIGHT, BEFORE 

MIDNIGHT... THE SERVANT WILL BREAK FREE AND SET OUT TO REJOIN HIS MASTER. THE DARK LORD WILL RISE AGAIN WITH HIS SERVANTS AID, GREATER AND 

MORE TERRIBLE THAN EVER HE WAS. TONIGHT... BEFORE MIDNIGHT... THE SERVANT... WILL SET OU... TO REJOIN... HIS MASTER.... 

Harry dropped the crystal ball he was supposed to return to Professor Trelawney and ran.

Thus began a very fateful night.

+

Remus walked through the Castle that evening and felt a weird shift in the air. Exams were over sure, but there was a certain trio that seemed the opposite of celebratory. Making his way down to the Great Hall, he took a seat next to Professor Sprout.

“Evening, Lupin.” She said happily.

“Good evening, Professor.” He responded kindly.

“Y/N coming soon?”

“Hm? Oh, I’m not sure, she’s taking a nap now. She’s been awfully tired this past week.”

“That’s okay, classic end-of-year burnout” she replied, then proceeded to ask him how if he had finished all his grading.

Remus conversed with her a bit distractedly as he watched over the Gryffindor table, spotting Harry, Ron and Hermione. They were visibly pre-occupied and were huddled away from the other students, discussing seriously.

“Have you heard from Hagrid? Poor thing, his Hippogriff’s been sentenced to death today. It’s going to happen tonight, any minute now actually I think.”

Remus turned to face her. “Really? That’s horrible…”

Professor Sprout pursed her lips in agreement before taking another bite of chicken.

Remus looked over at the trio again. They were standing up hastily, walking out of the Hall with quick little steps. He frowned. What were they up to?

He took the time to finish his dinner calmly and bid the fellow staff goodbye. Making his way back into his office, he pulled out his things quietly as the bedroom door was still shut; Y/N was probably still asleep.

He took a seat at his desk and pulled out what looked like an old used piece of parchment.

“I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.”

The map opened and unfolded as traces of ink bled upon its pages, forming its intricate content. He scanned it quickly, before turning his attention to Hagrid’s Hut. Hagrid’s dot was there, along with Dumbledore’s and other names he assumed were Ministry officials.

Running along the path to his Hut, he stopped at the two dots moving right under the Whomping Willow. It was Harry and Hermione. Where was Ron? What were they doing by that tree?

A thought popped in his head and his stomach sank. He moved up the map, praying to God that his far-fetched conjecture wouldn’t be true. Landing on Hogsmeade Village, he looked for the Shrieking Shack. The weight in his stomach sank even further. Ron’s dot was there, accompanied by none other than… Sirius Black.

His hands shook. He had to go help him. But as he watched the dots move, a third one came into view.

It was labelled “Peter Pettigrew”.

At that second, the blood had left Remus’ face. His hands grew cold. He shook the paper. He rapped his wand at it. He blinked and blinked again. The dot was still there, labelled with that name as clear as day.

In that very moment, a 13 year-old puzzle just came together with this one final piece. The web wove itself to completion. He understood… Stuffing his wand in his pocket, he jumped out of his chair and sped out the door.

+

In the Shrieking Shack, blood pressures were high.

Ron lay in the corner, with his weight off his broken leg, clutching his rat Scabbers. Hermione stood in the corner, quiet and pale.

Harry was fuming, frozen with his wand lifted and pointed to a ghastly, ghost-like Sirius Black.

"Going to kill me, Harry?" he whispered. 

Harry stopped right above him, his wand still pointing at Black's chest, looking down at him. A livid bruise was rising around Black's left eye and his nose was bleeding. 

"You killed my parents," said Harry, his voice shaking slightly, but his wand hand quite steady. 

Black stared up at him out of those sunken eyes. 

"I don't deny it," he said very quietly. "But if you knew the whole story." 

"The whole story?" Harry repeated, a furious pounding in his ears. "You sold them to Voldemort. That's all I need to know." 

"You've got to listen to me," Black said, and there was a note of urgency in his voice now. "You'll regret it if you don't.... You don't understand...." 

"I understand a lot better than you think," said Harry, and his voice shook more than ever. "You never heard her, did you? My mum... trying to stop Voldemort killing me... and you did that... you did it...." 

Crookshanks jumped in between the two and sat itself at Black’s feet, looking back at Harry with deep yellow eyes.

The seconds lengthened. And still Harry stood frozen there, wand poised, Black staring up at him, Crookshanks on his chest. Ron's ragged breathing came from near the bed; Hermione was quite silent. 

And then came a new sound - 

Muffled footsteps were echoing up through the floor — someone was moving downstairs. 

"WE'RE UP HERE!" Hermione screamed suddenly. "WE'RE UP HERE -- SIRIUS BLACK - QUICK!" 

Professor Lupin came hurtling into the room, his face bloodless, his wand raised and ready. His eyes flickered over Ron, lying on the floor, over Hermione, cowering next to the door, to Harry, standing there with his wand covering Black, and then to Black himself, crumpled and bleeding at Harry's feet. 

"Expelliarmus!" Lupin shouted. 

Harry's wand flew once more out of his hand; so did the two Hermione was holding. Lupin caught them all deftly, then moved into the room, staring at Black, who still had Crookshanks lying protectively across his chest. 

+

Y/N woke up to a dark room. She groaned and rubbed her eyes. Her entire face felt scorching hot and her mouth was dry like she hadn’t drank in days. She rolled over in the bed. She had crawled under her blankets in the evening before dinner for a quick nap, but judging by the chill and dark air outside, she must have slept into early night.

She felt a tightness in her pelvic area, like cramps. She placed a hand on her abdomen.

Pulling herself out of bed lazily, she head to the bathroom. Her period was supposed to start a few days ago, so this must’ve been it. However, as she sat down on the toilet, there was nothing.

Suddenly, a realization jolted her mind awake.

She ran back to the bedroom, rummaging through her drawer for a pregnancy test. She went back to the bathroom and waited for the result.

Positive.

She put down the test swiftly, looking away as she felt her heartbeat quicken. She couldn’t believe her eyes. Slowly, she picked up the stick and read the result once more.

Holy shit.

She looked around her and it occurred to her that Remus was nowhere to be found. She checked the clock. It was well past 10pm. 

Where the hell was he?

+

"Where is he, Sirius?" 

Remus spoke in a tense voice, cutting through the weighted silence that took over the Shrieking Shack.

Black's face was quite expressionless. For a few seconds, he didn't move at all. Then, very slowly, he raised his empty hand and pointed straight at Ron. 

Mystified, Harry glanced around at Ron, who looked bewildered. 

"But then..." Lupin muttered, staring at Black so intently it seemed he was trying to read his mind, "... why hasn't he shown himself before now? Unless" -- Lupin's eyes suddenly widened, as though he was seeing something beyond Black, something none of the rest could see, "-- unless he was the one... unless you switched... without telling me?" 

Very slowly, his sunken gaze never leaving Lupin's face, Black nodded. 

"Professor," Harry interrupted loudly, "what's going on --?" 

But Harry wasn’t able to finish his sentence, as what followed knocked the wind from his throat.

Remus lowered his wand. He walked to Sirius’ side, seized his hand confidently and pulled him to his feet. He gazed deeply into his eyes for a second, before the two men pulled each other into a deep embrace.

“I don’t believe it—“ Remus gasped, voice muffled.

“God, it’s been so long,” Sirius muttered back, “my friend.”

"DON'T BELIEVE IT!" Hermione screamed. 

Lupin let go of Black and turned to her. She had raised herself off the floor and was pointing at Lupin, wild-eyed. "You -- you --" 

"Hermione —"

“— you and him!" 

"Hermione, calm down —" 

"I didn't tell anyone!" Hermione shrieked. "I've been covering up for you —" 

"Hermione, listen to me, please'" Lupin shouted. "I can explain —" 

Harry could feel himself shaking, not with fear, but with a fresh wave of fury. 

"I trusted you," he shouted at Lupin, his voice wavering, out of control, "and all the time you've been his friend!" 

"You're wrong," said Lupin. "I haven't been Sirius's friend, but I am now — Let me explain...." 

"NO!" Hermione screamed. "Harry, don't trust him, he's been helping Black get into the castle, he wants you dead too -- he's a werewolf!" 

There was a ringing silence. Everyone's eyes were now on Lupin, who looked remarkably calm, though rather pale. 

+

Where the hell was he?

Y/N’s head was spinning as too much was happening at the same time. She glanced around hurriedly for signs of Remus, then remembered she was clutching the positive pregnancy test and looked back at the positive result, then saw the Marauder’s Map was splayed across the desk, still open.

She closed her eyes, and took a deep breath. She stuffed the test in her pocket then headed towards his desk. She’d be able to find where Remus was on the map, then would go back to sleep.

It took a while for her eyes to scan the entire Castle for his name, to no avail. Where the hell was he? Surely he was not outside… It then dawned on her that tonight was the full moon.

Shit. 

She looked over to the Shrieking Shack and nothing could have prepared her to see what she saw. Not one, but six dots. One was Remus, but he was accompanied by Harry, Ron and Hermione, as well as…

Y/N felt her heart freeze. Sirius Black? And… Peter… Pettigrew?

None of this felt possible. It couldn’t be. Grabbing her wand, she rushed out the office.

With this new information, the full moon had completely been replaced in her mind. Unfortunately, the only one who did seem to still remember was a certain Potions professor, on his way up to their office right now, where the map laid wide open.

+

"Not at all up to your usual standard, Hermione," Remus said. "Only one out of three, I'm afraid. I have not been helping Sirius get into the castle and I certainly don't want Harry dead.”  An odd shiver passed over his face. "But I won't deny that I am a werewolf." 

Ron made a valiant effort to get up again but fell back with a whimper of pain. Lupin made toward him, looking concerned, but Ron gasped, "Get away from me, werewolf!" 

Lupin stopped dead. Then, with an obvious effort, he turned to Hermione and said, "How long have you known?" 

"Ages," Hermione whispered. "Since I did Professor Snape's essay..." 

"He'll be delighted," said Lupin coolly. "He assigned that essay hoping someone would realize what my symptoms meant.... Did you check the lunar chart and realize that I was always ill at the full moon? Or did you realize that the boggart changed into the moon when it saw me?" 

"Both," Hermione said quietly. 

Lupin forced a laugh. 

"You're the cleverest witch of your age I've ever met, Hermione." 

"I'm not," Hermione whispered. "If I'd been a bit cleverer, I'd have told everyone what you are!" 

"But they already know," said Lupin. "At least, the staff do." 

“The staff? Does Professor Y/L/N know?” Ron gasped.

Sirius let out a howl of genuine laughter. “Professor Y/L/N!” He cackled. 

Remus scratched the back of his head, suddenly slightly bashful. “Professor Y/L/N and I… have been married for over 10 years.”

Harry, Ron and Hermione’s jaws dropped.

Silence fell over the room once again, as Remus stood there not knowing what to say next and Sirius standing by his side with his arms crossed, a slight smirk on his face.

“Well, we knew that!” Hermione exclaimed, finally. “That was more obvious than the werewolf thing! The whole school talks about it—“

She was interrupted as a new set of footsteps echoed from the staircase. The kids froze as Remus and Sirius turned to face the door, wands at the ready.

In burst Y/N, as if right on cue in a play. She was flushed and was panting, it appeared she had ran the whole way there. 

“Remus!” She cried out upon seeing him. “YOU HAVE A LOT OF EXPLAINING TO DO—“ She took a step forward until she spotted his company, and slowly took the step back. “What…” She murmured shakily, “is happening here?”

“Professor Y/L/N.” Hermione gasped softly.

Her eyes hovered over Harry, Ron and Hermione, who were in shock to see their Charms Professor, before landing upon Sirius. Something unrecognizable flashed across her gaze. She couldn’t believe what, or whom, she was seeing. She had thought the map made a mistake.

Y/N didn’t hear her. “Siri…?” she whispered, fixated on the man in front of her.

That’s when Harry lost it.

“‘SIRI?’ I TRUSTED YOU TOO! SO THIS WHOLE TIME -BOTH- OF YOU HAVE BEEN HELPING HIM?”

Y/N jumped from the sudden outburst and Remus came by her side to put a soothing hand on her shoulder. “Remus, you better explain and you better explain quick.” She said tensely.

“We have not been helping Sirius," said Lupin. "If you'll give me a chance, I'll explain. Look —" 

He separated Harry's, Ron's and Hermione's wands and threw each back to its owner; Harry caught his, stunned. 

“There”, said Lupin, sticking his own wand back into his belt. "You're armed, we're not. Now will you listen?" 

"If you haven't been helping him," Harry said, with a furious glance at Black, "how did you know he was here?" 

"The map," said Lupin. "The Marauder's Map. I was in my office examining it —“

"You know how to work it?" Harry said suspiciously. 

"Of course I know how to work it," said Lupin, waving his hand impatiently. "I helped write it. I'm Moony — that was my friends' nickname for me at school." 

"You wrote —?" 

Y/N caught Harry’s eye and gave him a confirming nod.

"The important thing is, I was watching it carefully this evening, because I had an idea that you, Ron, and Hermione might try and sneak out of the castle to visit Hagrid before his hippogriff was executed. And I was right, wasn't I?” 

He had started to pace up and down, looking at them. Little patches of dust rose at his feet. 

"You might have been wearing your father's old cloak, Harry--" 

"How d'you know about the cloak?" 

"The number of times I saw James disappearing under it...," said Lupin, waving an impatient hand again. "The point is, even if you're wearing an Invisibility Cloak, you still show up on the Marauder's Map. I watched you cross the grounds and enter Hagrid's hut. Twenty minutes later, you left Hagrid, and set off back toward the castle. But you were now accompanied by somebody else." 

"What?" said Harry. "No, we weren't!" 

I couldn't believe my eyes," said Lupin, still pacing, and ignoring Harry's interruption. "I thought the map must be malfunctioning. How could he be with you?" 

"No one was with us!" said Harry. 

"And then I saw another dot, moving fast toward you, labeled Sirius Black.... I saw him collide with you; I watched as he pulled two of you into the Whomping Willow —"

"One of us!" Ron said angrily. 

"No, Ron," said Lupin. "Two of you.”

He had stopped his pacing, his eyes moving over Ron.

"Do you think I could have a look at the rat?" he said evenly.

"What?" said Ron. "What's Scabbers got to do with it?" 

"Everything," said Lupin. "Could I see him, please?" 

Ron hesitated, then put a hand inside his robes. Scabbers emerged, thrashing desperately; Ron had to seize his long bald tail to stop him escaping. Crookshanks stood up on Black's leg and made a soft hissing noise. 

Lupin moved closer to Ron. He seemed to be holding his breath as he gazed intently at Scabbers. 

"What?" Ron said again, holding Scabbers close to him, looking scared. 

"What's my rat got to do with anything?" 

"That's not a rat," croaked Sirius Black suddenly.

"What d'you mean — of course he's a rat —"

"No, he's not," said Lupin quietly. "He's a wizard.”

"An Animagus," said Black, "by the name of Peter Pettigrew." 

"You're both mental.”

"Ridiculous!" said Hermione faintly. 

"Peter Pettigrew's dead!" said Harry. "He killed him twelve years ago!" He pointed at Black, whose face twitched convulsively. 

"I meant to," he growled, his yellow teeth bared, "but little Peter got the better of me... not this time, though!" 

And Crookshanks was thrown to the floor as Black lunged at Scabbers; Ron yelled with pain as Black's weight fell on his broken leg. 

"Sirius, NO!" Lupin yelled, launching himself forwards and dragging Black away from Ron again, "WAIT! You can't do it just like that -- they need to understand -- we've got to explain --" 

"We can explain afterwards!" snarled Black, trying to throw Lupin off. 

Y/N joined and stepped in front of Sirius. “Sirius, please!” She put both hands on his shoulders, causing him to flinch. Her voice was shaking. “They deserve to know the full picture.”

Black stopped struggling, though his hollowed eyes were still fixed on Scabbers, who was clamped tightly under Ron's bitten, scratched, ad bleeding hands. “Fine. But make it quick. I want to commit the murder I was imprisoned for.”

"You're nutters, all three of you," said Ron shakily, looking round at Harry and Hermione for support. "I've had enough of this. I'm off." 

“Ron.” Y/N said sternly. “Sit down. I’m not joking, you’re going to listen.”

Hermione spoke, in a trembling, would-be calm sort of voice, as though trying to will Professor Lupin to talk sensibly. 

"But Professor Lupin... Scabbers can't be Pettigrew... it just can't be true, you know it can't..." 

"Why can't it be true?" Lupin said calmly, as though they were in class, and Hermione had simply spotted a problem in an experiment with grindylows. 

"Because... because people would know if Peter Pettigrew had been an Animagus. We did Animagi in class with Professor McGonagall. And I looked them up when I did my homework -- the Ministry of Magic keeps tabs on witches and wizards who can become animals; there's a register showing what animal they become, and their markings and things... and I went and looked Professor McGonagall up on the register, and there have been only seven Animagi this century, and Pettigrew's name wasn't on the list." 

Lupin and Y/N laughed.

"Light again, Hermione!" he said. "But the Ministry never knew that here used to be three unregistered Animagi running around Hogwarts." 

Y/N cleared her throat.

“Sorry, four Animagi. Although we didn’t really know back then about you, my love.”

Y/N rolled her eyes. “Still, wanted to make sure you got the number right.”

Hermione’s eyes grew wider if it was even possible. “Professor Y/L/N, you’re an Animagus too?!”

Y/N nodded and gestured to Remus to proceed.

"All right... but you'll need to help me, Sirius," said Lupin, I only know how it began..." 

Lupin broke off. There had been a loud creak behind him. The bedroom door had opened of its own accord. All five of them stared at it. Then Lupin strode toward it and looked out into the landing. 

"No one there…"

"This place is haunted!" said Ron. 

"It's not," said Lupin, still looking at the door in a puzzled way. "The Shrieking Shack was never haunted.... The screams and howls the villagers used to hear were made by me." 

He pushed his graying hair out of his eyes, thought for a moment then said, "That's where all of this starts -- with my becoming a werewolf, None of this could have happened if I hadn't been bitter... and if I hadn't been so foolhardy..." 

He looked sober and tired. Ron started to interrupt, but Hermione, said, "Shh!" She was watching Lupin very intently. 

"I as a very small boy when I received the bite. My parents tried everything, but in those days there was no cure. The potion that Professor Snape has been making for me is a very recent discovery. It makes me safe, you see. As long as I take it in the week, preceding the full moon, I keep my mind when I transform.... I'm able to curl up in my office, a harmless wolf, and wait for the moon to wane again. Before the Wolfsbane Potion was discovered, however, I became a fully fledged monster once a month. It seemed impossible that I would be able to come to Hogwarts. Other parents weren't likely to want their children exposed to me. “

Hermione noticed a hint of sadness as she watched Y/N listen to her husband’s story.

"But then Dumbledore became Headmaster, and he was sympathetic. He said that as long as we took certain precautions, there was no reason I shouldn't come to school...." Lupin sighed, and looked directly at Harry. "I told you, months ago, that the Whomping Willow was planted the year I came to Hogwarts. The truth is that it was planted because I came 

to Hogwarts. This house" -- Lupin looked miserably around the room, -- "the tunnel that leads to it -- they were built for my use. Once a month, I was smuggled out of the castle, into this place, to transform. The tree was placed at the tunnel mouth to stop anyone coming across me while I was dangerous." 

"My transformations in those days were -- were terrible. It is very painful to turn into a werewolf. I was separated from humans to bite, so I bit and scratched myself instead. The villagers heard the noise and the screaming and thought they were hearing particularly violent spirits. Dumbledore encouraged the rumor.... Even now, when the house has been silent for years, the villagers don't dare approach it...." 

"But apart from my transformations, I was happier than I had ever been in my life. For the first time ever, I had friends, three great friends. Sirius Black... Peter Pettigrew... and, of course, your father, Harry -- James Potter." 

Y/N sniffed.

"Now, my three friends could hardly fail to notice that I disappeared once a month. I made up all sorts of stories. I told them my mother was ill, and that I had to go home to see her... I was terrified they would desert me the moment they found out what I was. But of course, they, like you, Hermione, worked out the truth...." 

"And they didn't desert me at all. Instead, they did something for me that would make my transformations not only bearable, but the best times 

of my life. They became Animagi." 

"My dad too?" said Harry, astounded. 

"Yes, indeed," said Lupin. "It took them the best part of three years to work out how to do it. Your father and Sirius here were the cleverest students in the school, and lucky they were, because the Animagus transformation can go horribly wrong -- one reason the Ministry keeps a close watch on those attempting to do it. Peter needed all the help he could get from James and Sirius. Finally, in our fifth year, they managed it. They could each turn into a different animal at will." 

"But how did that help you?" said Hermione, sounding puzzled. 

"They couldn't keep me company as humans, so they kept me company as animals," said Lupin. "A werewolf is only a danger to people. They sneaked out of the castle every month under James's Invisibility Cloak. They transformed... Peter, as the smallest, could slip beneath the 

Willow's attacking branches and touch the knot that freezes it. They would then slip down the tunnel and join me. Under their influence, I became less dangerous. My body was still wolfish, but my mind seemed to become less so while I was with them." 

"Hurry up, Remus," snarled Black, who was still watching Scabbers with a horrible sort of hunger on his face. 

Y/N bit her lip as she dared to watch her old friend. She wanted to go touch him, comfort him, after so long… but she remained frozen on the spot as Remus continued.

"I'm getting there, Sirius, I'm getting there... well, highly exciting possibilities were open to us now that we could all transform. Soon we were leaving the Shrieking Shack and roaming the school grounds and the village by night. Sirius and James transformed into such large animals, they were able to keep a werewolf in check. I doubt whether any Hogwarts students ever found out more about the Hogwarts grounds and Hogsmeade than we did.... And that's how we came to write the Marauder's Map, and sign it with our nicknames. Sirius is Padfoot. Peter is Wormtail. James was Prongs." 

"What sort of animal --?" Harry began, but Hermione cut him off. 

"That was still really dangerous! Running around in the dark with a werewolf! What if you'd given the others the slip, and bitten somebody?" 

"A thought that still haunts me," said Lupin heavily. "And there were near misses, many of them. We laughed about them afterwards. We were young, thoughtless -- carried away with our own cleverness." 

I sometimes felt guilty about betraying Dumbledore's trust, of course... he had admitted me to Hogwarts when no other headmaster would have done so, and he had no idea I was breaking the rules he had set down for my own and others' safety. He never knew I had led three fellow students into becoming Animagi illegally. But I always managed to forget my guilty feelings every time we sat down to plan our next month's adventure. And I haven't changed..." 

Lupin's face had hardened, and there was self-disgust in his voice. "All this year, I have been battling with myself, wondering whether I should tell Dumbledore that Sirius was an Animagus. But I didn't do it. Why? Because I was too cowardly. It would have meant admitting that I'd betrayed his trust while I was at school, admitting that I'd led others along with me... and Dumbledore's trust has meant everything to me. He let me into Hogwarts as a boy, and he gave me a job when I have been shunned all my adult life, unable to find paid work because of what I am. And so I convinced myself that Sirius was getting into the school using dark arts he learned from Voldemort, that being an Animagus had nothing to do with it... so, in a way, Snape's been right about me all along." 

“Don’t put it all on yourself,” Y/N said grimly. “The blame’s to share. We both decided to not go to Dumbledore.”

"Snape?" said Black harshly, taking his eyes off Scabbers; for the first time in minutes and looking up at Lupin. "What's Snape got to do with it?" 

"He's here, Sirius," said Lupin heavily. "He's teaching here as well." He looked up at Harry, Ron, and Hermione. 

"Professor Snape was at school with us. He fought very hard against my appointment to the Defense Against the Dark Arts job. He has been telling Dumbledore A year that I am not to be trusted. He has his reasons... you see, Sirius here played a trick on him which nearly 

killed him, a trick which involved me —" Black made a derisive noise. Y/N shushed him.

“Oh, Y/N, don’t go defending him now—“ Sirius chuckled.

“I’m not! I’m just— Rem, continue the story.” She said, crossing her arms defensively.

The two exchanged looks between each other, a bit of playfulness coming from Sirius’ end whereas Y/N still looked conflicted about being in his presence.

"Severus was very interested in where I went every month." Lupin told Harry, Ron, and Hermione. "We were in the same year, you know, and we -- er -- didn't like each other very much. He especially disliked James. Jealous, I think, of James's talent on the Quidditch field... anyway Snape had seen me crossing the grounds with Madam Pomfrey one evening as she led me toward the Whomping Willow to transform. Sirius thought it would be -- er -- amusing, to tell Snape all he had to do was prod the knot on the tree trunk with a long stick, and he'd be able to get in after me. Well, of course, Snape tried it -- if he'd got as far as this house, he'd have met a fully grown werewolf -- but your father, who'd heard what Sirius had done, went after Snape and pulled him back, at great risk to his life... Snape glimpsed me, though, at the end of the tunnel. He was forbidden by Dumbledore to tell anybody, but from that time on he knew what I was...." 

"So that's why Snape doesn't like you," said Harry slowly, "because he thought you were in on the joke?" 

"That's right," sneered a cold voice from the wall behind Lupin. 

Severus Snape was pulling off the Invisibility Cloak, his wand pointing, directly at Lupin. 

Hermione screamed. Black leapt to his feet. Harry felt as though he'd received a huge electric shock. 

Y/N gasped and clutched her stomach. Black slowly grabbed her shoulders and placed himself in front of her protectively.

"I found this at the base of the Whomping Willow," said Snape, throwing the cloak aside, careful to keep this wand pointing directly at Lupin's chest. "Very useful, Potter, I thank you...." 

Snape was slightly breathless, but his face was full of suppressed triumph. "I've just been to your office, Lupin. You forgot to take your potion tonight, so I took a gobletful along. And very lucky I did... lucky for me, I mean. Lying on your desk was a certain map. One glance at it told me all I needed to know. I saw you running along this passageway and out of sight." 

"Severus --" Lupin began, but Snape overrode him. 

"I've told the headmaster again and again that you're helping your old friend Black into the castle, Lupin, and here's the proof. Not even I dreamed you would have the nerve to use this old place as your hideout — and you too Y/L/N. Here you are helping him out, a real criminal couple you two are…”

"Severus, you're making a mistake," said Lupin urgently. "You haven't heard everything -- I can explain -- Sirius is not here to kill Harry --" 

"Three more for Azkaban tonight," said Snape, his eyes now gleaming fanatically. “Though I do feel bad for you, Y/L/N, you never should have gotten involved… in the first place…I shall be interested to see how Dumbledore takes this.... He was quite convinced you were harmless, you know, Lupin... a tame werewolf —" 

“Don’t - you - fucking - dare—“ Y/N said through gritted teeth, wanting to lunge forward to strike Snape, but Sirius and Remus caught her arms, holding her back.

“How sweet.” Snape said sardonically.

"You fool," said Lupin softly. "Is a schoolboy grudge worth putting an innocent man back inside Azkaban?" 

BANG! Thin, snakelike cords burst from the end of Snape's wand and twisted themselves around Lupin's mouth, wrists, and ankles; he overbalanced and fell to the floor, unable to move. Y/N screamed, throwing herself down to check on him. With a roar of rage, Black started toward Snape, but Snape pointed his wand straight between Black's eyes. 

"Give me a reason," he whispered. "Give me a reason to do it, and I swear I will." 

Black stopped dead. It would have been impossible to say which face showed more hatred. 

Harry stood there, paralyzed, not knowing what to do or whom to believe. He glanced around at Ron and Hermione. Ron looked just as confused as he did, still fighting to keep hold on the struggling Scabbers. Hermione, however, took an uncertain step toward Snape and said, in a very breathless voice, "Professor Snape -- it it wouldn't hurt to hear what they've got to say, w -- would it?" 

"Miss Granger, you are already facing suspension from this school," Snape spat. "You, Potter, and Weasley are out-of-bounds, in the company of a convicted murderer and a werewolf. For once in your life, hold your tongue." 

Y/N whipped her head around, hearing the way Snape was beginning to speak to Hermione.

"But if -- if there was a mistake --" 

"KEEP QUIET, YOU STUPID GIRL!" Snape shouted, looking suddenly quite deranged. "DON'T TALK ABOUT WHAT YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND!" A few sparks shot out of the end of his wand, which was still pointed at Black's face. Hermione fell silent. 

“ENOUGH!” Y/N jumped up, pulling her wand out and pointing it straight at Snape. “Hermione, get back.”

“Step aside, Y/L/N. You don’t know what you’re doing.” He grunted.

“I said, get back, all three of you.” Y/N snapped, Harry and Hermione hurrying and backing up to where Ron laid.

“Severus, I’m serious, you need to hear them out.” Y/N said. Her voice was steely. She moved out from behind Sirius and inched her way closer to Snape, softly but steadily like a cat.

Snape ignored her. Remus struggled against his binds, his eyes not leaving Y/N. But deep down, he knew he didn’t have to worry. He had seen her fight during the first Wizarding War, and he knew how much more powerful of a witch she had grown into. Snape unfortunately, did not, as he returned his attention to Sirius.

"Vengeance is very sweet," Snape breathed at Black. "How I hoped I would be the one to catch you...." 

"The joke's on you again, Severus," Black snarled. "As long as this boy brings his rat up to the castle" -- he jerked his head at Ron -- "I'll come quietly...." 

"Up to the castle?" said Snape silkily. "I don't think we need to go that far. All I have to do is call the dementors once we get out of the Willow. They'll be very pleased to see you, Black... pleased enough to give you a little kiss, I daresay... I --" 

What little color there was in Blacks face left it. 

"You -you've got to hear me out," he croaked. "The rat -- look at the rat --" 

But there was a mad glint in Snape's eyes that had never been seen before. He seemed beyond reason. 

"Come on, all of you," he said. He clicked his fingers, and the ends of the cords that bound Lupin flew to his hands. "I'll drag the werewolf. Perhaps the dementors will have a kiss for him too —" 

“Severus.” Y/N warned, wand still at the ready.

Before he knew what he was doing, Harry had crossed the room in three strides and blocked the door. 

“Harry!” Y/N cried.

"Get out of the way, Potter, you're in enough trouble already," snarled Snape. "If I hadn't been here to save your skin --" 

"Professor Lupin could have killed me about a hundred times this year," Harry said. "I've been alone with him loads of times, having defense lessons against the dementors. If he was helping Black, why didn't he just finish me off then?" 

"Don't ask me to fathom the way a werewolf's mind works," hissed Snape. 

"Get out of the way, Potter." 

"YOURE PATHETIC!" Harry yelled. "JUST BECAUSE THEY MADE A FOOL OF YOU AT SCHOOL YOU WON'T EVEN LISTEN --" 

"SILENCE! I WILL NOT BE SPOKEN TO LIKE THAT!" Snape shrieked, looking madder than ever. "Like father, like son, Potter! I have just saved your neck; you should be thanking me on bended knee! You would have been well served if he'd killed you! You'd have died like your father, too 

arrogant to believe you might be mistaken in Black -- now get out of the way, or I will make you. GET OUT OF THE WAY, POTTER!" 

“Okay, I said ENOUGH!” Y/N raised her voice. 

With a wave of her wand, the floor tiles under Harry’s feet rolled upwards in a wave, and sent Harry tumbling back to the back of the room where Ron and Hermione were.

“Snape, I told you to listen,” She said, advancing on him with her wand. “I told you, I don’t want to have to do this. But you have clearly lost your mind.”

Snape turned to face her. His dark eyes darkened even more. “And I told you, to get out of my way.a What are you possibly saying, Professor Y/L/N, you really think I’m going to duel you?”

Y/N cocked her head to the side. “Why, you scared you gonna lose?” She said in a volume just above a whisper.

Snape jerked his wand and a spell flew at her, she whipped her own wand and deflected it. It bounced to the wall and knocked an old painting down.

With her empty hand, Y/N reached out to the trio and conjured a sort of bubble around Ron, Harry and Hermione. It was a protection spell.

Remus screamed in muffled yells as his mouth was gagged, and Sirius tried to free him but to no avail, there was no untying magical ties without a wand.

Y/N’s chest was heaving as she felt her heartbeat quicken.

A rapidfire of spells followed, bouncing between the two like fireworks. Y/N waved her wand, deflecting those Snape sent at her, conjuring out some of her own in the milliseconds in between. 

Snakes shot out of Snape’s wand, flying toward Y/N. She waved her wand and they turned into pink satin ribbons, falling through the air. She flicked her wand one, two, three different motions and jets of orange, red and purple shot toward him. He deflected two of them and managed to physically dodge the third. Snape rose his hands and a ring of fire encircled Y/N.

Remus let out another muffled yell, struggling terribly against his restraints.

“Don’t-“ Y/N muttered through gritted teeth as she began to make effortful circles with both her wand and her non-dominant hand. The others watched in terror. “Piss - me - OFF—“

The molecules of water vapor surrounding her had liquefied and splashed down onto the floor to put out the flames. “The shack’s made out of fucking wood, Snape, you want us all to DIE?”

She raised her wand high above her head, the water getting picked off the floor and she pushed the wave into him. It slammed his body into the wall behind him and with another wave of her wand, the water froze; trapping him there, suspended. 

Remus watched from the ground in awe. He had forgotten how powerful Y/N had become and it was magnificent to witness.

Snape’s head had knocked back and it drooped down, hanging from his neck. He had been knocked unconscious.

Sirius found Remus’ wand and untied him.

Y/N took a deep breath and lowered her wand. She waved her hand, and the protective barrier in front of the trio disappeared. Remus jumped to his feet and rushed to her, capturing her in a soulful hug.

“Are you okay? Are you hurt?” He said, taking her face in his two hands, searching and scanning for signs of distress.

“I’m good, I swear.” She said, steadying her breath.

After what seemed like forever, finally Remus let her go. They immediately turned back around to heightened squeaking noises, coming from a very distressed Scabbers, still stuck in Ron’s tight clutch.

“Professor Y/L/N…” Hermione began. 

“That was amazing.” Ron breathed.

“How you used the Freezing charm to- to- Oh God, Professor Snape.” Hermione gasped once she saw what state he was in.

“This still doesn’t mean I believe you.” Harry said firmly.

Y/N, Remus and Sirius exchanged a look.

“Then it’s time we gave you proof.” Remus said, advancing.

“Ron, give us the rat.”

[tgmsunmontue]

Season to Taste - 18/? WIP

Explicit Hangster - Celebrity Chef Bradley and Naval Aviator Jake Seresin who have a relationship spanning the globe before they realize how tightly bound they are to one another. Heading into this little world.

PROLOGUE/ONE TWO THREE FOUR FIVE SIX SEVEN EIGHT NINE TEN ELEVEN TWELVE THIRTEEN FORTEEN FIFTEEN SIXTEEN SEVENTEEN

CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

                He starts keeping a record of his favorite dishes, what he likes and doesn’t like about places they eat. And they eat at so many different places. While he might ring Ice once a week or every other week, me calls Leandro and Silvia almost everyday. And everyday Leandro or Silvia give them another instruction, a food to try or a place to go and visit, or a restaurant to go to. Ask to meet the chef, tell them who you are. They are expecting you.

                It’s the fact that they’re always somehow expecting Bradley and Violet means they can’t not turn up. Sometimes it’s high-end places where they are so incredibly underdressed it makes him uncomfortable, but he notes that in the best places they don’t pay any attention to what he’s wearing, all customers treated with the same level of respect and deference and he likes it, reminds him of Leandro’s restaurant.

                “Why are you keeping all these notes?”

                “I… I think I might want to open my own restaurant.”

                “Holy shit. Really?”

                “Yeah. Is that crazy?”

                “Yes. Absolutely insane. Where?”

                “I don’t know… Where do you think?”

                “Well. How much money do you have?”

                “Shit. That’s a good question.”

                “It’s a good thing I have a business degree.”

                “What do you mean?”

                “Well, I’m not letting you go off and do it alone.”

                “Thanks Vi. I love you.”

                “Ew gross. Feelings. Love you too though.”

…            …            …

                He hears the door and the sounds of Jake kicking off his boots before they’re carefully placed out of the way. It’s after midday, so he’s not sure if Jake would have eaten yet, he’s just making some sandwiches, easy enough to simply put away for later if needed. Jake doesn’t bother calling out, heads straight for the kitchen like he knows that’s where he’ll find him and it feels nice, that he already knows Bradley so well.

                “Hey, how was your morning?”

                “Torture…” Jake offers. “But somehow not illegal.”

                “That bad huh?” Bradley asks, and Jake comes to stand at the corner side of the kitchen island, leans forward to give him a kiss and he can’t help but smile into it. The easy gesture of affection but also Jake’s dramatics over his sisters torturing him.

                “Do you promise not to hold my family against me?” Jake asks

                Bradley grins, goes to immediately tell him of course not and then pauses.

                “Well. As long as you can promise me the same, I guess. When the time comes.”

                “Pretty sure my five sisters are scarier than any family you can throw at me…”

                “Yeah… you’d think so. Probably. Just… uh. It’ll be fine.”

                They need to actually reach a milestone of maybe months or a year together before he considers raising his relationship with Ice. Vi might think his fame would cause issues, but he honestly thinks Jake won’t give a damn. Vi’s right, he’s far too down to earth and grounded to care about what fame or money Bradley might have behind him. He cares about the person Bradley is and it’s nice, makes such a nice change. However he suspects that Jake will care about his deeper ties with certain members in the Navy, especially given that they’re all Naval aviators as well. Right. Like what he thought before, he’ll cross that bridge when he comes to it. Jake has shifted closer, has stolen a sundried tomato and popped it into his mouth and chewing while he grins and then he’s kissing Bradley properly, the sharp tang of tomato still in his mouth.

                “Why are you always initiating sex in the kitchen...?”

                “It is pretty much where you spend a lot of your time. Where I find you…”

                “Huh. Yeah. I guess you're right.”

                “Hmm. Maybe spend some time somewhere else and then you might find me doing this in other places…”

                “Mmm. So it’s not me in the kitchen gets you going huh?”

                “Baby, you anywhere and everywhere gets me going. Think we've already determined the fact that all I need to do is look at you...”

                “Sweet talker.”

                “Just for you. Also we ain’t having sex yet. This is just a welcome home kiss. You forgotten what sex is already?”

                Bradley laughs against Jake’s mouth.

                “Yeah, think it’s slipping from my memory. You better remind me…”

                “Mmm. Hard job but someone’s got to do it…” Jake murmurs and Bradley hadn’t meant it as an invitation, not really, but Jake steps behind him, draws him back so that Bradley’s ass is cradled against his hips, he can feel Jake’s growing erection pressing through the layers of denim and his own cock has already started racing to catch up, an almost Pavlovian response now to seeing Jake simply walk through the door and surely he’s going to get used to it eventually. He braces his hands against the counter, shivers as Jake nips at the side of his neck, his hands pressing down over Bradley’s.

                “Yeah, keep them there…”

                “Huh?”

                Then Jake’s palming his cock, fleshy part of his palm dragging and pressing and he jerks a little, caught between wanting to grind back against Jake’s cock or press into the friction of his hand. He can’t decide, glad Jake clearly has a plan as he works Bradley’s jeans open, hand slipping inside and pulling his cock out, starting to work it, not giving him time to think other than I was making sandwiches for lunch. Instead he’s panting, hands white-knuckled on the kitchen bench as he feels Jake’s body flex behind him as he works his hand down-up-down.

                “One day I’ll come home and you’ll be in nothing but the apron…”

                Bradley lets out a choked laugh, wants to say something about saving it for a special occasion, he’s not wearing an apron right now, but Jake is shifting so he’s more caged in by his body, more of him is pressed up against Jake as he grinds his hips against Bradley’s ass, his teeth nipping at Bradley’s neck.

                “Love making you come for me…”

                “Oh,” the breath punches out of him and he doesn’t last much longer, Jake holding him in place as he shudders through his orgasm, can’t believe a handjob has him coming that hard. Jake makes a humming sound and Bradley wonders if he’s imagining him sounding pleased with himself, before he’s stepping away to wash his hands in the sink and Bradley’s glad he’s supporting himself against the bench.

                “You going to let me take care of you now?”

                “Oh sweetheart, I’m banking on it.”

…            …            …

                Jake isn’t sure what has opened the floodgates for Leo, but he listens as talks about his childhood, his dad dying in a training exercise at Top Gun and now that he thinks about it, he vaguely remembers reading about it, like they have to read through all the accidents and incidents so they can be better prepared. Bradshaw. That’s why the name rings a bell.

                Then his mom being diagnosed with cancer, his godfather being there when he’s not deployed. Other naval aviators being present as he grew up and he uses callsigns like they’re as natural as breathing and it occurs to him then that when Leo had said he knew what Jake’s job entailed he had really meant it. He knows it can be dangerous. He knows Jake will be gone for long periods of time and that communication might sometimes be difficult, even if it has gotten much better. Leo was raised not only by a family in the military, but by naval aviators and if Jake had been looking for someone that might understand his job without doing the job themselves, then he couldn’t find someone better.

                Then Leo talks about his mom dying, his godfather pulling his papers and his immediate and drastic decision to take the first plane out of the country. He files it away, that Leo’s first response when hurt and angry was to run away, wonders if that’s still the case. Then Leo is talking about his other family, the Gallo’s, and the way the name sounds has him grinning.

                “Sounds like you’re saying gallows…”

                “Yeah, pretty much. Why is that funny?”

                “Well, I know it means rooster, among other things…” Jake says, and he can’t help the grin as he thinks of the sexual prowess and loud voice. “But my callsign is Hangman.”

                “Okay…” Leo says, and it’s clear from his tone that he has no clue what Jake is referring to.

                “You’re clearly not a Styx fan. But there’s a line, Hangman is comin’ down from the gallows… You’re the Gallo…”

                “Then the line needs to be changed a little. Maybe going down on instead?”

                “Yeah? Just maybe?”

                “Yeah. Just maybe.”

NINETEEN

[dira333]

When the Love of your Life has a twin - Osamu x Reader (Angst)

A/N: Hurt, no comfort.

Life played a cruel joke on you when it decided to make the love of your life a twin.

You didn’t know it then, when you met him, when you got to know him. 

You know it now.

-

Osamu is the calmer of the two, but not to be underestimated. 

Your friends don’t approve of him. 

“He doesn’t talk much. I couldn’t even hold a conversation with him.” One acquaintance points out and you wonder if she might have gotten them mixed up.

Did she really meet Osamu? Your Osamu, who never shuts up when around you? Who you’ve spent hours talking on the phone, your conversations spanning so many topics you forget half of them when you try to remember the next morning.

How was your childhood? Do you wanna get married someday? Are you afraid of dying? What’s your favorite food?

You’ve met Atsumu once, in passing, have shaken his hand and introduced you, but that was then and this is now.

You don’t know what he thinks of you, what he knows of you. 

Has Osamu spoken about you before? Has he mentioned you like he mentioned his brother?

“You sound just like my brother… You’re as crazy as Tsumu!... Oh, I know what you mean, Tsumu’s like that too.”

You’d always taken it as a compliment, because you’ve seen and heard and felt how close they are. And all you wanted was to be just as close to him.

-

You need to breathe. Sort out your feelings.

Imagine an empty room, enough space to put all your thoughts in order.

Because here’s the truth, as simple as it’s painful.

You’ve never been more to Osamu than a friend.

Just a friend. 

It had taken you less than six months to fall in love with him. To understand that this was the kind of person you wanted to spend your life with. Someone you could hold entire conversations with via text, just because he liked to ask questions, liked to know what you were thinking. Someone you spent nights with - pretending to work, but getting distracted by your conversations until it was much too late to be still awake like this.

Less than six months before he pulled the rug from under your feet for the first time.

“I cannot offer you a relationship right now. I’m too busy with work. I cannot see myself in a relationship right now. I’m sorry.”

-

It has taken you more than two years to realize that you cannot be friends with him.

Because you will always want to be more.

Because he never says no when you text him, never stops you when you just want to talk.

And your traitorous heart cannot understand that all he wants to be is friends when you talk through the night. 

Your friends have long grown tired of this topic.

Just move on, they say. You’ll find someone better.

But you don’t want to find someone better.

You want to find him. You want him to be the right person, want him to want it too.

But your traitorous heart won’t stop bleeding and your traitorous mind won’t stop thinking of him.

So you take a step away. And another. And another.

Until there’s enough space between the two of you that you can have days go by without thinking of him. A week. An entire month.

You change jobs and don’t tell him about it. You help organize a party for a joined friend and ask someone else to send him an invite. He does not show up.

You still haven’t deleted his number. He has yet to change his profile picture. 

In less than a week you will probably meet his twin.

And you’re as unprepared for that as you’ll ever be.

-

Tonight, you’ll try to sleep.

Try not to think about tomorrow or the day after, even less of what will be in less than five days.

You’ll cling to the only hope you’ve left.

That Atsumu will not recognize you.

Because if he does, if he knows, would he be kind enough to stay polite?

After all, Osamu always said you were quite alike.

If there’s anything left to hope for it’s that.

That Atsumu might read in your eyes that you never wanted it to be like this.

And maybe, just maybe, he’ll respond in kind.

My Kofi if you want to tip me

[hatredmadeofgold]

I'm a terrible person with words, but here I go. (using a translator, my English is a little shit when it comes to writing and a little bit when it comes to pronunciation, ha!)

I would like to say with ALL my heart that I love your work and the writing in "Sing to Me", my heartbeat even accelerates when I remember the existence of this work of art and how wonderful the sensation was, the euphoric feeling of read each chapter and see all the care and dedication put into it. I have immense affection for Raiden, Sam (and Monsoon :)). Seeing how complex they are in the story brings me immense satisfaction, and I just wish all the positive recognition for you, it's impeccable.

(There's a lot I'd like to express, like my hyperfocus- but hey, I'm a terrible person at showing appreciation and affection, I hope you got the message anyway :))

hugs and kisses from a Brazilian! 🇧🇷❤

Oi, não se preocupa! Não sou falante nativo, mas entendi muito bem. Da próxima vez, você pode me escrever em pt-br (´▽`ʃ♡ƪ)

Thank you so much!! I am really happy to know that you enjoy my work 💕 Honestly, every time someone tells me that they enjoy Sing to Me so much, I am getting really happy. This fic means a lot to me and gives me lots of strength and stability, although on the outside it might look that I am not doing much for it for the past year (I do, it's just background work that I can't show T_T massive spoilers and so on). But I mean, I kept saying that each time somebody came to my inbox about it for the last months.

And I am so glad to know that you're feeling like this for each chapter you've read so far! This fic in itself is really complex and long, I could give you a rough estimate of around ~100 Chapters for the main story (Those would be just arc 1-3, the series, however, has 6 arcs in total excluding the 2 AUs). Sooo... let me say, you've got a lot to look forward to, I suppose :3

Also I hope that you'll be curious about the revisions too. Chapter 5 and 6 will have a darker tone than their current version that is on AO3 at the moment, but also will be much better in quality. Chapter 6 will have major changes I think, especially the second halve of it. I am all giddy and excited myself whenever I think about all the plans I have for this story. The drama, the comedy, the (bitter-) sweetness, but also the chaos, the pain and the darker parts of this fic. I wish I could go on a ramble but it's so many spoilers lmao And I don't want to take that away from my readers. If anything, I might drop a few essays about Raiden and Sam that I've got on my to-do list at some point, that in some cases will directly tie to Sing to Me as well.

The series also goes in great detail about Sam's past and who he is as a person because I was a bit dissatisfied with how most fics for this pairing at least that I've read didn't come up with much for his past (but I still liked all of them regardless), hence I went a little bit insane about him. To the point that Sam is technically my OC now (according to my beta reader) lmao

Jsyk, this is my current graph view of my Obsidian vault for Sing to Me and all the dots that connect to him:

My vault is an absolute mess still tbh because the program is a bit overwhelming when you don't know where to start, so this is far from how complex this fic actually even is.

What I can tell you pretty much spoiler free is that the series is complex because timeline wise, it starts in the year of 2001 and ends (technically) in the year of 2026. I say technically because ARC3.5: The War in Heaven goes a bit crazy with science fiction elements and time is... let's say, "relative". The main fic spans from 2019 until 2023 btw.

The prequel (ARC0: I Come with Knives) is entirely about Sam's past, from his POV entirely, and a collaboration with @thatthereneverwas since he originally requested me to write it. Basically adding more Sam lore that we definitely need :3

Please don't hesitate to come to my inbox or DMs if you want to chat about Sing to Me, samuraiden or just Sam or Raiden with me! I don't bite :] Monsoon is also my favourite from the Winds of Destruction aside from Sam, so I get you! I've been thinking of maybe including him in the fic as well, but it's uncertain how so yet, and if it will just be a flashback of some sort 🤔 But I take notes as I go, we'll see :3

Beijos pra você também 💞

[scarabjewels]

What Mad Girl Movies Taught Me:

Never Be Like Me

(Lessons From Helter Skelter and Black Swan)

Beauty and perfectionism has been ingrained to how we build our self identity, social acceptability and self worth. This just has to stop. So here I am, sharing my opinions and experience, in hopes that someone who is struggling the same way finds this and say " wow, I am enough. The world is just fucked up".

Let's get on to it as I dissect the moral lessons two beloved movies of mad women we can all learn from.

Helter Skelter: Beauty As A Trend is Never Achievable

I have noticed how fucked up body trends are, in all known genders yes, but especially the heterosexual ones.

It really is so fucked up how it is normal to treat the body like a moldable accessory, when it's literally what works hard keep you alive because it is you! In just a span of a decade from 2015 to 2024, the trends over body aesthetics is crazy. I can tell you that sexism and ingrained toxicity in social constructs are alive and maybe even so flourishing with globalisation, whilst civil wars are coexisting. It's crazy (but that's another conversation).

Lately, another wave of Heroin Chic is hitting the influencer network, this wave has been a long time coming, especially during and after the pandemic. People have been trying to get healthy, yes, but for the wrong reasons, so much so that people just try to look healthy when in fact they got there from the artificial place.

Just around mid-2010, big ass and a tiny waist were all the rage. Yes, it opened up the door to the body types acceptance but also glamorized it, too much. Then by 2020, healthy body figures became the rage again: abs, toned muscles and no fat. Interestingly, body positivity also came along with the trend, opening the new target audience in markets: the plus size. Here we are at mid 2020, where heroine chic came back, along with toned look. The influence of this trend came with the build of many celebrities losing weight, such as Kim Kardashian removing her buttlift, Christina Aguilera looking like she was in her early 20s again, Nikoavokado coming back with relatively a drastically changed body and many more.

I will be honest that I accidentally jumped into this trend train. I lost weight drastically in a span of 6 months, due to self harming habits. (Please be warned of the terms I am using to describe what happened to me, I did not get diagnosed, even when it is very obvious what is happening to me). Ever since I was younger, I unconsciously trained myself to not eat when I am upset which led to repercussions I am yet to recover from. My weight would fluctuate all the time as a teenager and even now as an adult, as I get upset for longer periods of time, and the stress of that period still stays even after I feel better. So my eating habits would have split days of completely normal times to eat or literally starving because I slept in the whole day, that is my journey right now which is actually quite better than before. I would be physically incapable of even digesting food properly, my stomach would reject just the thought of eating again, which would only happen if I try to eat outside of the house (very specific I know), yet I would eat just fine at home. I couldn't eat because it would literally hurt. It was the worst periods of my life honestly. I couldn't function well, I couldn't sleep , one time I fainted at work from extreme fatigue.

Needless to say, I lost too much weight. Not skin -bone, but a drastic comparison from before. I am not happy, I am not moving much, and I feel like I am not enough, because now I am developing body dysmorphia. I was fine when I was a little over weight, I am jolly, active and full of life (not all the time, but most is pretty good!) I moved a lot, I am talking about long walks and trekking, and it was just for FUN. I loved it. Now, I can barely move and at age 22, my bones would "pop" or "creak" just from an occasional stretch or kneeling.

Look at what happened to the patients of the clinic where Lilico and other people were obsessed with beauty. Suicide, because they couldn't afford to lose their new look. They would rather die beautiful than live. Lilico is fucked up in her own way, yet her actions' main motivation is because of the delicious power she has from her perfected beautiful appearance. Fame, a rich guy who is obsessed with her, money, easy manipulation of others. She wanted it all. She wants to be what everyone wants, and just from her monologues, you can tell she hated every single minute of it, especially in the manga. She treated herself like a perfect product no one should ever dare to one up, yet she knew she was just a product, that her market value will end eventually. That girl went bat shit crazy. She was addicted to the good stuff her socially praised beauty was. It is obviously not worth it!

Oh here is one too: ageism. Look, it is well and alive before so is today. The amount of males who told me women have a ticking clock of attractiveness is frustratingly high and even exists in younger generations. Age is the number of years you have been alive on this earth, not a set of intervals of attractiveness.

Like what the detective said: "Youth is beautiful but not inherently beauty". You know what you get with age? Wisdom, even more beauty, journeys of epics and living life to the fullest.

Look at the Golden Girls. If you ever have a chance to watch that show, you find that dating at an older age is great and sometimes rocky, like any type of dating. Their age in that show is supposed to be around 50 to 60, and they were ACTIVELY DATING. They even tackled the insecurities of being older, having wrinkles, a hanging stomach, and being unattractive, and it is always countered. It isn't true what they say, that you are attractive at only a certain age. Honestly, I prefer the type of dating in an older age. You MOSTLY know what you want from the other, and because you have gone through a lot already, it's faster to move on. Also, these ladies mostly dated men AROUND THEIR AGE. Now, this is important too. Males have told me that men just age better with time, and that's not true at all. It depends heavily on each individual, irregardless of age and gender. The Golden Girls dated handsome men, overweight men, men of different races and religions, average men, etc. They like to get to know the person (Blanch, though, is so hyperactive, so maybe not always getting to know them for who they are, but she does value traditional dating) because that is way more valuable than their looks.

Lilico didn't even like anyone, not even herself. Probably just her sister, she loves her but well she is Lilico so toxic af. Sex is not even making love to her, it's a business transaction, a tool for manipulation, and a means to an end. That's fucked up.

Let's this be a cautionary tale: achieving society's beauty will never be worth it.

I discussed said toxic beauty standards. Now, let's move one ahead with the toxicity of perfectionism.

Black Swan: There is No "Perfect"

Perfect? No, she was brilliant, but she was never "perfect". Perfectionism is so toxic in itself already, I know because I used to participate in it too.

I wanted to be perfect in writing the best, it didn't matter to me if I was not on the top ten highest grades in class, as long as I am the best in that one thing I am good at. However, my story is not close enough to Nina's extremely perfectionist behaviour, so I will share one that is closer to that tale as well as the point the movie and I am trying to make.

I am Asian (Filipino) and just from above, I can say that that really is the school system here, yes being a nerd is normal and being the TOP NERD was so important, I saw people broke down because they didn't win at a class competition. Toxic, right? Self-worth was associated with how good you are at academics and those over-achieving people envy others who had it easy. I was one of those who didn't struggle with academics as much, I got good grades , even when I didn't study. University did humble me, of course. Still, it doesn't bother me if I got a bad grade or a good grade. But the comments I hear from the one who worked hard to be "the best", damn. I once had a classmate who really wanted the best record in her academics. She was obsessed with it. Losing sleep, losing patience, and losing her mental health, basically. I did ask her once when she was stressing about not getting in a higher rank in the top ten, I asked her : "Does it matter?"I didn't mean it as a serious thing, but it came out like that because she replied,"It matters to me. " The tone was "I want to win." Look, her hardworking personality is ENOUGH to get her a job (she really wanted a job to get out of the house), I just wish she wasn't stressing out about winning so much. Back then, I remember her being in a bad mood, because she didn't sleep working on a project or she had a bad group mate (to be fair to her, everyone hated that person for good reason). She was ENOUGH, and I hope she sees that about herself now.

I think sacrifice is discussed a lot when talking about toxic perfectionism but behaviour from the get go isn't talked about enough.

Nina Sawyers is an example of the bad behaviour of any toxic perfectionist. She would do ANYTHING to get to the top. She tried to seduce the director to get the part she wanted, she would sabotage Lily who was friendly to her all through out as a person wanting to steal her part, she would do anything that it literally messed with her head, that her fate was her karma. She was jealous, envious and had no GOOD DAY unless SHE WAS THE PERFECT ONE. She loved the praise but couldn't handle anything less.

Nina needs to cut her mother out of her life, go out and actually have fun, and have friends who she doesn't see as competition. She needs to be friends with her peers of the same interest, too. God, that girl has no friends. She is too busy with her craft, and also, her mom is overbearing, which probably drove her to isolate from others.

One other thing, like in Helter Skelter, Nina sees her skill as a marketable tool that puts her above the rest, which is also why she is so paranoid when the director keeps comparing her to Lily, feeling threatened to be replaced. The director is an asshole, but it is pretty clear that those comparisons were meant to constructive criticism, though he needed to work on that bad delivery, also I think he was unconsciously and consciously manipulative of his muses in general. The past "Oddette", before Nina, probably experienced all the build-up paranoia that led her to extreme actions such as aggressively confronting Nina and stabbing herself in the face.

No person should ever feel like they are replaceable because they are worthless. No one should ever feel like they have to be the best because that's the only way that makes them worthy. You are worthy, nonetheless of your skill.

The Conclusion: You Are Never Enough For Them, You Are Enough For You

I know I discussed Nina and Lilico as cautionary tales, but we also to acknowledge the society that drove them to that point. We, as a society, glamorize the best of what we see: skill, craft, art, beauty, age and etc. We failed to acknowledge that we are putting impossible pedestals on them. We treat "good" things as if that is what should be good. We really failed to SEE BEAUTY AND GOOD IN OTHER THINGS.

Lilico was bullied for being fat, fetishised for being fat, and praised for being perfectly beautiful. Then, she is shamed for her past.

Society really ruined her.

As for Nina, she was always praised for being perfect, yet she had no friends because she saw them as a competition. Her over bearing mother would put her down (I saw more moments of her downplaying her skill, though in hindsight, rather than actually celebrating and supporting) .That is a factor as to why she thrived in praise so much in ballet. That is where she could be loved and FREE.

Her mother failed her, and the perfectionism ruined her.

Do not ever go to that point where you find yourself going crazy over an unreachable height. Be kind to yourself, so someone is comparing to other people? wow, aren't they someone who notices too much, that person has no life to live. Also, don't do that to yourself, don't be the loser who always looks down on others, who compares themselves to greater people because they are not enough, that is not a habit you want lingering.

I also was a person who compared themselves often to others, guess where I got that from? My flesh and blood: my mother. I still remember it, she compared me to a good friend of mine and it led me to compare myself to everyone. It was ONE passive-aggressive comment. I hated it so much, and I never did that to anyone.

I learned that I hated that feeling whenever someone does it to themselves or others to that to me, I take offence and say that that is such a sorry way to think then I realized I was like that. I had friends like that, and guess what? the Habit is still here, but I now combat it because I have no friends who do that to themsleves or others. I was done with that mentality.

I don't like it, so why should I linger in that energy?

Now, I implore you to really look at the bigger picture, think and do what is truly best for you, no matter what others say.

[skylarmoon71]

Aaron Hotchner (Criminal Minds) Chapter 36 - Final

Walking into the BAU that morning, you’re unnaturally happy. 

The day seems to go by like any other. 

You’re assigned a case and just like that, you’re all on the road again. Throughout assessments and profiles, you can’t help but cast looks at Hotch. You’re a bit giddy, because at times, he seems to already be looking your way. 

It’s an amazing thing. 

For the next couple of days you’re a bit busy, and when you return from your most recent case, the professional wall lowers and you and Hotch feel like regular people again. The team is bidding their goodbyes, and you wave them off as you head to do a bit of filing. Hotch has certainly had the same idea. 

He’s in his office finishing up, and the sight of him through the blinds brings back some memories. 

It’s a bit involuntary. 

“If that’s all you can leave.” 

His tone is cold, you’ve gotten used to it. Hotch is never one to spare words when it’s necessary. That’s why it's weird he has so little for you. Mostly, it’s just hard to be this close yet unable to touch him like you did. Hold him. Smile and watch him lower all those guards he wears bravely for the sake of his team. 

“Yes sir.” 

Just those words were a bit hard to utter. It’s crazy how you both went from lovers to strangers in the span of a few days. For them, you’ve only joined for a few months, but your father had dropped you off right after Hailey was safe. 

Now you’re back on the team but it’s not the same. 

At the time it was difficult, but just seeing him, seeing the way Jack would light up whenever he made a surprise visit with his mother at the bureau, it felt right. 

Then there were the times that you could see it. The fear in Hotch’s eyes at the thought of never seeing you again. He couldn’t have imagined what you planned to do, but you knew he realized whatever it was, you would be the one getting the short end of the stick. Just like that, all those days, weeks, months, they would be gone. He’d rushed right for you, despite it all, but it was useless, you were gone, into the veil with your father to give Hotch a better life. A happier one. Easier one, even if you couldn’t be a part of it. 

“Don’t…Don’t go with him.”

“DON’T!!” 

“Goodbye Hotchner.”

A sour feeling settles in your stomach and guilt washes over you at all those conflicting thoughts. 

Maybe that’s what possesses you to move to his office. You walk up the short flight of stairs, and as you enter, it looks like he’s ready to call it a night as well. 

“Are you ready to go?” 

You ask softly. 

He nods, stacking the files on his desk. You close the door, and then you linger there making him look up. 

“I’m sorry Hotch.” 

He’s a bit confused on why you’re apologizing.

“I thought that I was doing the right thing. My father told me that he could bring her back and I..it felt selfish not to try and give you a chance to be happy.” 

He couldn’t believe you were actually apologizing. He can say without a doubt that he understood and respected what you did. You knew that making such a decision would rob you of your own happiness, but you saw a chance to ensure he would still have his and you took it. Not just for him, but his son. There weren’t words to express how much that meant to him. 

How much you mean to him. 

Hotch approaches, taking your hand. 

“You brought back Hailey. Because of you Jack doesn’t have to grow up without a mother.  (Y/N), you sacrificed your happiness for me. For Jack. There’s nothing I can do that could ever make up for that.”

You’re teary eyed again and you smile. 

“I love you so much…” 

You manage to say. He can’t help but smile. You’ve stolen the words right out of his mouth. It’s a bit crazy. When you started this partnership, there was so much uncertainty. 

Hotch had hardly trusted you at the start, but now looking at him here, it’s hard to picture what life would be like if you hadn’t transferred in. He changed a lot in your life for the better. You can’t imagine life without him. 

“I love you too.” 

He kisses you happily and you hold on tight. 

There’s nothing more you can ask for in life. 

You’re both content.

Complete.

[cobaltperun]

The new EF chapter?? hello??

i want to go on a rant again and maybe I'll probably do that , so again if you don't like it just tell me and I'll stop cause this is just a jumble of feelings that i felt after reading this.

The whole unscripted kiss? i am still fucking reeling from it cause jenna felt a tender moment between them and went straight for it😂

the whole feelings regarding the kiss was amazing too.loved it. Imagine them doing an interview in the future and just going , "Yeah , our first kiss was actually an unscripted one and it never made it in the movie💀" and their fans going absolutely crazy over it.

Reader having insecurities?? At this point i am ready to read a fic abt Reader × reader😂😂 doesn't even makes sense, but you write your Y/Ns totally amazing and badass and i know in the EF Universe, almost everyone is in love with her .

Barbara has officially won me over and i fucking love her. To sum up my entire feelings for her in a single line - I WISH WE ALL HAD A BARBARA IN OUR LIFE.

The whole event thing after that? that had my mind racing as fuck. i read up until that part and had to leave cause my lunch ended. My mind was filled up with thousands of different theories. it went from reader having a girlfriend to reader going to do drugs to reader having a child and god i don't even know what i cooked up in the span of 4 hours😭😭😭

Jenna stopping her from going to the said event? Just the bond that they have formed over the span of 2 months and being so comfortable and in sync with each other is absolutety beautiful to read and i need you to know that your writing is absolutely amazing like i am lacking the necessary words to describe it.

The whole balcony scene that you changed from the originals🥺 Mikey teasing the absolute shit out of reader and jenna😂😭 loved that as well..

I think you elaborated on the scene where jenna falls asleep on reader during filming cause i know in the original EF there was a line regarding the same so i can definitely say i am all here for the extended version!!

And reader going to underground fights?!? You weren't lying when you emphasized on the giving reader unrelentless trauma😭😭 I can't wait to see how she navigates through it.

This turned out to be way too fucking long and you can absolutely ignore it. i would not blame you. Seriously.

Anyways, hope you are having an amazing day!

Please take care of yourself and drink enough water!! ❤️

Love you❤️

-👾

If I don't like it? Way too long? My friend, I feel confident saying you are every writer's dream come true! I LOVE THIS! I LOVE YOU! 😁😁💙💙

This could be the very last interaction I get for EF and it would be enough to keep me writing this story until I get it done, that's how much I fucking loved reading this! I swear, if your next ask was you requesting me to write an x reader story for a character I knew nothing about my question would be: Where do I learn about this character? I would not hesitate to jump into a story the size of One Piece!

If I ever ignore or get bothered by an ask/reply/message/anything like this know I have either gone crazy or that isn't me.

And you're still not back at full health! And... and... I love you, I 100% love you. How are you, by the way? Any better?

Now, guess I should actually respond to this. Jenna absolutely did just go for it, hell, she nearly went for it again 🤣🤣 what can I say, she's got it bad. Speaking of fans, should I, once say Wednesday comes out, start including fans in the story? Because yeah, I imagine they would be going crazy over that information.

Stop! Reader x reader would be so damn funny? How would that even work? 🤣🤣 like, at that point I'm just writing a second point view original book 🤣🤣

Yeah, we all need a Barbara. I'm really happy with how she is turning out and you can bet you'll be seeing more of her in the future, especially between projects.

Look, I have never paid much attention to Mikey's interviews, but somehow I feel like she would tease them. And it feels funny considering the roles they play 🤣

Yeah, that scene was mentioned in EF originally, and considering what happened in this chapter I felt like that was needed, for more than one reason.

And finally, the trauma, oh, my dear 👾, you didn't see anything yet, that's just the tip of the iceberg.

Once again THANK YOU SO MUCH! I LOVE YOU!!! 💙💙💙

Edit: I did not just miss answering two whole paragraphs 😅🤣 that's what I get for doing it on my phone. Yeah, having to stop at that point where Reader goes: "I'm in" is unfortunate but you really went wild with the theories. A child? Damn 🤣🤣🤣

Jenna stopping her scene went through so many versions in my head, but I'm happy with the one I wrote, and from the looks of it you love it, so thanks! 😁💙💙

[babyitsbeautiful]

Life Update for 2023. (It's a long one.)

For those that follow me on other social media platforms, you already know what's been happening and I appreciate the love and support.

For those that don't, I feel like this is long overdue. Especially to my 'crash through the surface' readers. I promise I will give you the ending you deserve.

To start, this has been a hell of a year. So many unexpected things have happened in such a short time frame that it's hard to convey just how crazy it's truly been.

I gained a new sister with whom my father had out of an affair before he died 23 years ago, although she is wonderful in every way, so I guess I can thank him for at least giving me another beautiful sister.

We met at the beginning of the year and have stayed close ever since. It's like we've known each other forever. The first half of the year was very exciting for me. I had a new sister, got to do so many fun things and work the Vampire Diaries/Originals convention for Creation Entertainment. Truly an amazing few months. I was so excited to find out how the rest of the year would go. I was even in the mood to start writing again.

But then the unimaginable happened. My 8 year old blue heeler, Lucy, had what we thought was a benign fatty lipoma (she had all the signs) removed at the beginning of July that turned out to be a high grade mast cell tumor that was basically untreatable and irreversibly fatal.

Ironically, we got the news two weeks after her surgery, on the 23 anniversary of my dad's death... from cancer. I was completely devasted. I could tell immediately that her vet did not want to give me that news. I asked every question I could think of and was told there was nothing I could have done to prevent it, nor would Chemo even work at that point, it was already too far progressed. He told me to ignore the estimated remaining life span noted in her test results (less than 4 months) and to just love and spoil her everyday. I told him I already do that, but I did go the extra mile for her anyway.

We had a good rest of the summer, all the way through September she showed no signs, other than the metastatic growth of the cancer cells in the same area on her belly, forming twice as worse than before. But she didn't mind, and just continued to live her best life.

I told her that she would get to see her Uncle soon, my younger brother, when he came to town for our new sister's wedding at the end of September (he walked her down the aisle, hella cute btw.) She loves loves loves her uncle, and was beyond excited to see him.

And I swear to you she stayed as strong as she could just to be able to see him one last time because on the day he left, her tumors ruptured and her health started to rapidly decline. I did all that I could for the month of October to keep her here with me. We bandaged her up so the bleeding would stop, she got medication from the vet, but there was only so much that could be done. She stayed so strong though, I could tell she was a fighter, still with a smile on her face.

But in that last week, when the medication no longer worked and she lost that smile and had that look on her face, a look of intense pain and just all around defeat, I knew she needed me to carry her strength.

She silently told me that she was ready and I made the call that changed my life forever. So on October 25th, we said our goodbyes and she fell asleep in my arms before waking up on the other side of the rainbow bridge where there was no more pain or fear.

She was my entire world and I, hers.

It's been a month now, and it still hurts every day, but every day is a little better than the last. The second half of the year has really changed me in so many ways. My life is so different now, because my entire life revolved around taking care of her. And I wouldn't have changed it for anything. Lucy was never a people person kind of dog, she did not like strangers or other animals. So if I wasn't working, I was at home with her. The times I had a social life or travelled were rare and far between.

But she's gone now and my life belongs to just me again. It's a strange feeling really, not having that kind of dependency anymore, but I revel in it at times.

I've travelled more in the last month than I have in years as keeping myself busy and away from an empty apartment helps. I will be going to New York for the first time this New Year's Eve, which is amazing and so exciting.

I confess that at first I felt the guilt of being able to do fun things at her expense of being gone. But her being gone was not anyone's choice, it was just something that neither of us could control and I had to end her pain when it was still beginning rather than have her suffer more than she already was. I know that. I would just rather have her with me for a few more years than be able to do fun things. She was my fun thing. ♥

With all that being said, I am at a very different stage in my life now that involves me getting back into the things that make me happy, which is writing.

I never intended to go this long without updating this story, but then life, like the one I've lived this year, happens and certain things just take precedent over other things.

I will be getting back into 'crash through the surface' very soon. I've thought about it more in the last few weeks than in a long time. So to my readers both (potentially) new and old, thank you thank thank you for the love on what we have so far. The story is far from over.

Also a huge thank you to everyone who has me on Facebook and Instagram and keeps up with my craziness, I truly adore all of you.

And if you don't but want to: @hollyelizabeth3

[whumptimebaby]

Happy One Year to Turning Red!

I can't believe it's been a whole year since Turning Red released to the public, that is actually crazy. There are no words for what Turning Red has done for me as a person, but you sure as hell know I'm gonna try to explain 😎

I went into Turning Red as a new University student, at a huge transitional period in my life. I had a whole four friends, and more emotions than I knew how to deal with. I'll never forget the feeling of sitting next to two of my IRL's in my Pixar class, and scream singing Nobody Like U as the credits rolled. It felt like middle school again. It felt great to be Canadian, and neurodivergent, and queer, and it felt especially great to be in fandom.

I knew from the moment I walked out of that room that I was going to write fic for 4*Town. I'm a sucker for a boy band, it was bound to happen, but God, I didn't know what was going to become of it. I thought I'd write one or two fics and move on to the next fandom, you know?

I wrote You Know What's Up (It's Us), and about halfway through I had another idea for a fic. It was a commitment, a 15000 word monstrosity that took a month's worth of planning and writing, but finishing it meant the world. To this day, I've never been so nervous to publish a fic.

The plane crash fic changed everything for me, because now I had a universe to play with, not just an interpretation of some characters, so I sat down to work out how everything worked. I created a story spanning from 1995-2014, and chipped away at little moments from it. There was the beach music video, that time Aaron T got kidnapped, that time Jesse got in a car accident, all little snapshots and character studies that were part of something bigger.

I've been wanting to tell the whole story for a while now. There are so many aspects of it that I've been so excited to share, but for a while I just... didn't know how.

I know I haven't been posting fics like I used to, but I promise it was for a reason. I've mentioned a super secret project a couple of times now, and I think today is as good as any to reveal what that is. I've been working on it since July for fuck's sake 😭 It's been killing me not talking about it.

But first! I want to say that the thing I'm most grateful for from this whole thing is meeting @5town and @wondero28. I love both of you so much, and you've really made this community a home for me. Thank you for putting up with my bullshit 🫶🫶

Now without further ado, have a teaser, a sneak peek, a tiny glimpse at 4*Town: The World's Most Tragic Boy Band

A documentary on 4*Town's career spanning from 1995-2004, and taking place 10 years after they officially disband. The boys talk about the things they've gone through year by year, with behind the scenes footage from their tours, music videos, and rehearsals.

The current plan is to finish the damn thing (💀) and then release each year one at a time with releases twice a week, Wednesdays and Saturdays, which means the whole thing will be out over the course of five weeks. The format is... to be determined. I have a feeling formatting this for AO3 is going to be hell, but I'll figure it out!

So yeah! That's the super secret project! I'm so excited to show you all the whole thing, because I'm really, really proud of it!

[tardis--dreams]

I really have to work on my thesis so here's a list of all the dramas I've watched this year and a summary of my most beloved blorbos

• 오징어 게임 - Squid Game: watched once in January. Loved it a lot but couldn't rewatch because it was too heavy for me at the time.

• 쓸쓸하고 찬란하神-도깨비 - Goblin/Guardian the Lonely and Great God: watched once in February/March, cried every episode, need to rewatch soon

• 괴물 - Beyond Evil: You may not have noticed but i have developed some sort of unhealthy obsession with it. Watched it 5 times in total within the span of eight months. 3 times in April, once in July/August once in November. Nothing will ever compare. It changed my brain chemistry. Got the script books despite probably only knowing like 15% of the vocabulary in there but can read them effortlessly because i know the entire show by heart.

• 무브 투 헤븐: 나는 유품정리사입니다 - Move to Heaven: watched it completely once in April. My nose got sore from crying too much. Sometimes i rewatch an episode just to feel something. Beautiful.

• 악마판사 - The Devil Judge: watched 4.5 times so far. 3 times in May/June, once in September/October and got halfway through my fourth rewatch in December (and will continue that eventually). I am obsessed. Absolutely, utterly Obsessed. Second drama i got the script books because i love it so much.

• 나의 해방일지 - My Liberation Notes: watched once in June and fell in love. Very high on my to rewatch list and if they release a script book I'd absolutely try to get that as well!

• 해피니스 - Happiness: Watched twice. First time within the span of 3 days in June/July. I had Corona and was isolating and dreamed about it every. goddamm. night. The whole "what do we do with the infected? Should we throw them out or kill them?" really seemed to resonate with me there lol. Rewatched in September and definitely will rewatch again.

• 내일 - Tomorrow: watched once in August. Idk why i expected something light hearted (i really don't know why) but i loved it very much despite the dark and heavy topics.

• 타인은 지옥이다 - Strangers From Hell: watched once. Was a wild ride.

• 배드 앤 크레이지 - Bad and Crazy: watched twice in August. I absolutely hadn't expected to love it so much. It touched my heart and I'll rewatch it regularly.

• 인간실격 - Lost: Watched once in September. Loved it a lot.

• 나의 아저씨 - My Mister: Watched once in October. No words. Will rewatch. People really weren't lying when they said it's a master piece.

• 악의 꽃 - Flower of Evil: Watched within the span of 3 days in December and am currently on my 1st rewatch. Easily gets to share first place of my favorite dramas with Beyond Evil and The Devil Judge. SO EMOTIONAL. (Also love how it shows how psychiatry and psych diagnoses are used to dehumanize and criminalize people and how it can shape a person's sense of self. Classic example of character assassination. But we don't talk about this on here.)

Now, to summarize my faves:

There's no hierarchy but if I had to say what's my favorite drama, the first place would go to Beyond Evil, which has the first first place, meaning it is untouchable, so it would be unfair to say it's my only number one. Therefore the ranking of my faves goes like this:

1.1 Beyond Evil.

1.2. The Devil Judge, Bad and Crazy, and Flower of Evil

My favorite special little guys are:

• Han Juwon: Very Blorbo. Pathetic wet dog of a man, annoying little bitch (affectionate), I wanted to slap him sometimes as much as I wanted to hug him. He's very dear to me)

• Kang Yohan: Poor little meow meow! Also pathetic wet dog of a man. Very much enjoyed going from hating him to loving him more than my life.

• Ryu Soo Yeol: Classic Blorbo. Also pathetic wet dog of a man (arguably the most pathetic). I love him very much.

• Do Hyun Soo: HAS NEVER DONE ANYTHING WRONG IN HIS LIFE EVER! He doesn't even give me pathetic wet dog of a man vibes witch is shocking since this is apparently my type! Nothing was more heartbreaking than seeing him sobbing and apologizing and breaking down after so many years of hiding his identity. Deserves the best dad award. I love him so much you don't even understand. (I guess the reason i trusted him from the beginning on was the fact they labeled him with a certain diagnose. You tell me that guy is evil because a psychiatrist said so? So he must be a good person! (Sorry my hatered for psychiatry and psychiatrists/therapists shines through a bit much when I talk about this show/character)).

This, unfortunately, shows very clearly that my type™️ is men with childhood trauma (: Dongsik is very dear to me as well, but since all the horrors started for him after 20 years of having a loving childhood and teenage years, I guess i got imprinted on Juwon instead.

Characters I wanna marry so badly:

• Yoon Saebom

• Yoo Jaeyi

• wouldn't say no to Do Hyun Soo tbh. Has proven to be the perfect husband-

If i stop writing this post I'll have to deal with my thesis so uhhh what can i ramble about.. Oh i know:

BEST OST:

• The Devil Judge! Sexiest OST I've come across so far. Tempest and What You Gonna Do are definitely two of the best songs in the history of songs

• Strangers From Hell! This show might not be my favorite but nothing comes close to this soundtrack.

• Beyond Evil! Empty and 향해 reduce me to tears and Timeless is just unmatched

• Happiness! Pain really hit hard with the line "please i just want everything to stop". Also most of the songs featured aren't even on the official OST but they are SO good!

[why485]

I wanted to do another Fuutaroubowl predictions update now that I’m officially halfway through at chapter 62. This also felt like a good checkpoint since it’s just before a huge story arc and a bunch of crazy stuff has just happened!

Ichika - 0% No change in ranking, but there’s a more substantial reasoning behind it. Ichika is both too mature and not selfish enough to pursue a relationship with Fuutarou. She definitely likes him, but will self-sabotage her chances because she doesn’t want to potentially ruin the group dynamic, and she would also rather see her sisters win (mostly Miku) if it has to happen.

Nino - 35% Nino has thrown everything into complete chaos. Within the span of a volume, Nino’s totally changed and I have no idea what she’s thinking anymore and neither does she. She’s very aggressively attacking right now. She wasn’t satisfied with the “ambiguous confession because it was too loud to hear” and so confessed again like 30 minutes later with no ambiguity whatsoever. This definitely raises her chances (15 points), but not too much because it feels too early in the story for this to go anywhere, and because I dunno, would you trust Nino in a relationship? Still, I have to hand it to her for doubling down the way she did. That’s very atypical of manga writing.

Miku - 1% It’s a pity 1%. I love you Miku and I’m cheering you on but there’s no way you can win no matter how hard you try. You’re just too cute.

Yotsuba - 40% She’s just such an unknown. Now that there’s a serious confession in play, I have to point out that Yotsuba was actually the first, way back in chapter 21. It was so early though that Fuutarou was just confused. The thing is, I don’t think she was lying, but I also don’t know why she would say that after knowing him for only like a month at this point. It’s totally possible she was the girl in the photo and actually remembers everything, and the contrast between Yotsuba and Nino’s confessions kind of makes me think she has a chance now so she’s up 10 points.

Itsuki - 65% There’s not too much to say about Itsuki. She still feels like the Taiga to Fuutarou’s Ryuuji. I like her a lot, I think they’d be a great pair, and I’d be totally okay with her winning. That said, she’s almost too close to him at this point. Almost like she’s already family, so I could see that going against her, thus a loss in 5 points.

Quints Harem Ending - 2% Every time they do a flash forward it catches me by surprise and my conspiracies get more and more schizophrenic. What if he’s marrying a symbolic Rena as a stand in amalgamation to represent all 5 of them?!

[heartxshaped-bruises]

MUNDAY ASKS !!  

  @nanlanmo: ❛❛⭐️💭❓💘 🖊 🗒 🎧 💖❜❜ 

                                          ✧･ﾟ  𝐀𝐍𝐒𝐖𝐄𝐑𝐄𝐃.

⭐️ — SUN, MOON & RISING SIGNS, IF KNOWN 

Scorpio (Sun), Cancer (Moon), Sagittarius (Rising)

💭 — MBTI AND / OR ENNEAGRAM, IF KNOWN

INTP-T - Turbulent Logician (MBTI)

❓ — THREE ADJECTIVES THAT DESCRIBE YOU

Perfectionistic, Enthusiastic, Sarcastic

💘 — WHAT AND / OR WHO DO YOU CONSIDER NEAR AND DEAR TO YOU?

For one, my great-aunt. In my family it’s been normal for several generations to grow up with more than one “mom” bc most kids grew up together. That goes for both my grandma and her sister, my mom and her siblings / cousins and me and my cousins. I’ve got like 4 moms and my biological one and my great-aunt are the ones who are still alive. We even call my great-aunt “Mama [Name]”.

And apart from her, my theatre friends. We are having a reunion with all the theatre kids and it’s crazy how it has been over ten years since I’ve seen most of them for the last time but whenever I meet one again we are still as close as we used to be. I love them very much.

🖊 — ANY TATTOOS?

Nope. I’ve been thinking more than once about getting one (also bc I’ve been told people are disappointed since I am what they call ‘that kind of person we expected to have tattoos’, whatever that means), but honestly? I get bored too easily. If I am already changing my hair in any shape and color and other things all two to three months I know exactly that I would get bored with a tattoo in the same time span.

 Bc of that I’d probably get it in a place where I wouldn’t have to look at it all the time bc I’d get pissed and that shouldn’t be the emotion or intention behind it xD (( Emry argues with me on that, but never listen to your muse who made more than one questionable tattoo choices ))

🗒 — WHAT IS / ARE YOUR FAVORITE GENRE(S) / THEME(S) TO WRITE?

I am very much into anything limited to a Small Town plot, really. Especially Horror, Crime, Romance, but apart from that I am also into Apocalyptic stuff.

🎧 — DO YOU WRITE WHILE LISTENING TO MUSIC / PODCASTS / VIDEOS / ETC. OR DO YOU NEED TOTAL SILENCE?

Depends on the muse I write. With most of them I like to listen to music and it also isn’t crucial to what kind of music I am listening to. With Joe tho I can’t really do that bc I have to get the tone of his character right and he’s like so removed from my own mindset that relating to him while writing is more challenging than with, let’s say Abel.

💖 — WHAT WAS ONE OF THE GREATEST / HAPPIEST MOMENTS YOU’VE HAD IN THE RPC?

It’s been a long while but basically when I went back to visit @snowinabottle​ on New Year’s Eve in 2016 ❤️

[lookiamnotshameless]

I do think quite a bit about what to do with Mebiusline. (Hi tag, same translator, new blog.)

The original common route translation was done within a crazy 2-month span in 2012, and I started the retranslation project somewhere in 2017or 2018, I believe. It was slow going because I'd gotten a lot more responsibilities on my plate, but my Japanese is also vastly better than it was in the Second Age of Arda so the actual translation itself was done faster.

I've put it more or less on hold because the climate of the world and the internet, of fu fandom, has changed. And to be honest, I'm not sure if Mebiusline aged in such a way that fits it anymore.

Mebiusline was a game that did something interesting when it launched. The whole route design of the game was not based on earning affection points, but doing an alignment check for Kyouichirou. The whole thing was about an MC who grew up during Japan's most nationalistic period/State Shintoism and, during that age where new clashed with old and values were very volatile, and through your choices you get to pick where he stands. He's very much a product of his time, everyone in it are products of their time, and if you apply a modern lens to 1923, it becomes a choice between which flavor of conservatism you support. How much Shinto are you Shintoing? How much Nationalism are you Nationalisming? Considering that you uh, can have a situationship with a possible (fictional) instigator of the Pacific War, that's a fair bit of Nationalism the modern lens would want to interrogate---I did want to interrogate this when I played---and Mebiusline does feint around that a lot. It turns out that the possible instigator of the Pacific War isn't really about toxic Nationalism as much as it's about the way you corner yourself and gaslight yourself through trauma and proceed to destroy everything that could've made a difference, because sunken cost fallacy is a bitch. And all that. Kyouichirou is also not very supportive of the Marxist movement, I'd have to say. (Yeah, the political left at the time was more Leninist? Stalinist? than Marxist, but there was that bit with his dad and the looms).

Is that sort of thing really desired by modern fu fandom, or is that just fuel for pitchforks?

I have somewhat of a script here. It hasn't been worked on in a few years. If I continue now it would be faster than it ever was, life being so much busier than 2012 aside.

But would there really be something of worth in it?

(One thing I do like is that it's the How much Shinto? routes that feature the most progressive people, hilariously. You would think that picking the sus black paper would be a point towards the sus military people, but no, it's Shigure because black papers are weird and he's into weird shit only people who just imported the printing press would think of making.)